Saying I Love You
by zabini91
Summary: Lily spent her whole life hating James . . . but will a year of separation make Lily realize just how she feels about him?


Lily ran a comb through her long, crimson hair one last time before running out of her room and meeting Amanda in her living room. "Okay, I'm ready!" she exclaimed, grabbing Amanda's hand and pulling her out the front door and to the car.

Lily was really excited to go to Sirius' party; mostly because she would get to see James for the first time since graduation. It wasn't until a week after graduation that she started to miss him, but was always too nervous to get in touch. It had been an entire year now, and Lily hadn't heard a single word from the man.

She pulled into the highway of Sirius' house and leapt out of the car as soon as the engine was off. As she ran up the front stairs she heard Amanda yell, "Wait up, Lily!"

Lily just waved her hand, motioning to Amanda that she was too excited to wait. After ringing the doorbell she danced around on the doorstep, hopping from foot to foot. Finally, after what seemed like hours Sirius came to the door and pulled her into a hug.

"Lily! I've missed you so much my darling angel!" he exclaimed. Lily just rolled her eyes and pushed him away, looking over his shoulder to see if James was there. "I'm glad you missed me, too, Lily" he muttered, motioning her into the living room and moving to greet Amanda.

She searched around the room and didn't see James, so she walked into the next room. "Remus!" she yelled, giving him the obligatory hug and looking around the rest of the room. "Is James here yet?" she asked, getting a laugh from Remus.

"You two are so much alike" he teased, "All I've heard from him today is: Lily this, Lily that!" Lily laughed and shrugged off the comment, walking beck into the other room. She got there just in time to see James stumble down the stairs hurriedly. Seeing his messy black hair and rumpled shirt brought a smile to her face.

Suddenly, she became nervous, and she could tell that James felt the same way as his pace slowed, and he ran his hand through his thick hair. "Um, hi James" she said nervously, "It's, um, good to see you . . ."

James quickly gathered his composure and became confident once more. "Lily Flower! I've missed you so much!" he yelled, strutting over to her and resting his arm on her shoulder.

Lily felt her face grow warm and quickly turned away, walking over to her friend Amanda. She could see that Remus had walked into the room and was now smirking at Lily's actions. He whispered something into James' ear and James then passed the secret on to Sirius, causing a huge smile to erupt on his face.

"Everyone, gather round in a circle!" he yelled, motioning with his arms. Lily just noticed that there weren't many people at the party yet. It was only Lily, Amanda, some other girl and the Marauders. "Where is everyone else?" she asked curiously, sitting in the circle that had now formed. "They won't be here for another hour" he clarified, setting himself in the circle and declaring, "We are going to play Truth or Dare!" he yelled, pulling out a bottle of veritaserum.

Lily rolled her eyes and heard Sirius say, "I'll go first!" He looked around the group and his evil eyes landed on Lily. She shrank back, trying to get out of view. "Truth or Dare, Lily?" he asked, starting to laugh.

"Truth" she chose, trying not to make eye contact with anyone as she grabbed the bottle of veritaserum, drinking a few drops and looking at Sirius expectantly. "Are you," he started, wagging his eyebrows in Remus' direction, "In love with James?" he asked.

Lily's cheeks grew a deep red and she looked to the ground. She could feel the words come to her lips and immediately drew her hands up to cover her mouth, "Mph" she answered. Sirius jumped over to her and pushed her to the ground, prying her hands from her mouth and asking again, "Are you in love with James?"

Lily shook her head violently, trying not to let the words come out of her mouth. She felt the effects of the potion wearing off and tried her hardest to wait as long as possible before answering. "No" she muttered, surprising herself with the lie.

Sirius sat up with surprise and looked at her strangely, "You're not?" he asked. "No, I am not in love with James Potter" she repeated. She saw James look quickly to the ground and suddenly felt really bad. It was clear that James was still in love with her, and she could only imagine how much she hurt him with those few words.

Lily came back downstairs to see about a hundred more people spread throughout the room. She spotted a table with food and refreshments and walked over to it; grabbing a glass of fire whiskey and gulping it down, feeling it sting her throat. She blinked back the tears it brought to her eyes and walked out onto the dance floor just as a slow song started.

Sirius grabbed her hand and pulled her into his arms for a dance. They danced silently for a few seconds before he sighed heavily and said, "I was certain you were in love with him" he muttered, "I would never have asked you that otherwise."

Lily looked up into his eyes, "Why does it matter?" she asked curiously. Sirius looked down into her eyes and spun her onto the dance floor, causing her to be caught by James. James looked down at her solemnly. "I guess things haven't changed" he muttered. Lily looked to the ground and tried to pull out of James' arms. When he continued to hold her in place, she moved her arms back up around his neck and danced along with him.

She looked up into his eyes and saw the pain he felt showing through them. He quickly looked away but Lily reached up and turned his head back towards her. Keeping her eyes on his, she leaned up and kissed his lips lightly. He looked down at her in shock. "I love you" she whispered to him, smiling in relief. "What?" he asked, not being able to hear her over the music.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him up the stairs, leading him into an empty bedroom and sitting him on the bed. He looked at her curiously, waiting for her to talk. "Okay, um, I kinda l-" she started before crossing over to the bed and sitting down next to James. "I love you" she said for the second time that night.

James looked at her in shock before shaking his head and arguing, "You took veritaserum and you said you didn't. Why are you lying?"

"I'm not lying" she stated, "The veritaserum had worn off. I lied because I didn't know if you still felt the same." He shook his head in disbelief and looked down at his hands. "Okay, look" she said, rising from the bed and walked over to the dresser, grabbing a vial of the potion and dowsing the entire amount. "Ask me anything" she said, "This is enough to last hours, so it won't wear off"

"Do you really love me?" he wondered, walking over to her and taking her hands in his own. "Yes" she answered truthfully.

"When did you know you loved me?"

"A week after graduation. I didn't realize until then just how much I missed you" she said, the information slipping out of her mouth.

James smiled and leaned down, covering her lips with his own in a passionate kiss. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that" he confessed. "About seven years?" she guessed, laughing. "Okay, then, you do know."

The two laughed and walked back to the party hand in hand. "Oh" he said suddenly once they reached the bottom of the stairs, "I forgot. Will you be my girlfriend?" Lily smiled and nodded quickly, kissing him again.

"What the hell?" Sirius asked, walking up to the two, "I thought you didn't love him"

"I lied" Lily stated simply, dragging James away and leaving Sirius in his state of confusion.


End file.
